Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Raising the Challenging Child -Part 3 "It Really Does All Work Out in the End"

I know how difficult it can be at two in the morning when your child wants to scream because you won't get up and play with her.  That was us two nights ago as our youngest decided that she had had enough of being in bed and wanted to get up and play.  When she found she could not get up and play and that she really was tired, she wanted to nurse non-stop.  We didn't get it right;  we got frustrated and snippy with each other.  One thing that we have to remember as a parenting team is that we have to go forward and that this WILL all work out in the end.  We are just starting the Challenging Child journey with this, my fifth child, but we know that the long nights will one day lead to huge grins as we enjoy a child who is comfortable with where she is in the world. 

Child One recently graduated high school and is going to college on an athletic scholarship.  When she was a screaming, demanding infant, I never dreamed that one day she would be a well-rounded member of this family.  I do remember feeling that I had somehow failed her and I knew from that day on that I would strive to help her turn out to be all that she could be.  She has grpwn into a good person, a great basketball player, and the best big sister and daughter a family could have.  Most of the credit goes to the fact that she has decided to be a decent person, but I'd like to think that some of the time we took to help her readjust and re-enter the family as an attached member were beneficial to her sense of belonging.  Eventually, she will be entirely responsible for herself, but I would like to know that the skills she learned as a child help her in her daily life and that she can pass those on to her own family.

Child Four will be attending pre-school in the fall and we are all excited for her as she begins her school career.  Like her challenging sister before her, she is bright, precocious, intelligent, and eager to learn new things.  Unlike her sister, she has had attention and responsiveness to her needs and demands from the moment she enter the world and she will begin school with a better understanding of who she is and her place in her family and in her world.  I wish I had been able to give that to Child One from the beginning.  Even though it took us until she was in the third grade to realize how to help her grow, she turned out better than okay, more than average.  It will be interesting to see how Child Four and Five turn out.  Our first Challenging Child is setting the bar fairly high for her siblings.  Let's hope that they can all achieve their goals and live to 100% of their own potentials.     

No comments: